would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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