I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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