Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Congratulations! We have a period
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
