You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
he was CRYING into my vagina
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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