# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Randomize
