I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
