My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
