The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
No subtext here. People are naked.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize