I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
