that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
