Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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