I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
