I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
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