he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
