belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
You did what with his pubic hair?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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