hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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