Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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