Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize