i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
