Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
