me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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