YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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