I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Well I just put wine in my tea
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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