so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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