Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
