I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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