What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize