Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
