Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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