the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize