It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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