do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
