I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
