that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i will never coherently bang her
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
