Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
