Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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