Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
