if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Randomize
