Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
