Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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