shes about as inviting as chlamydia
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
