Your face is a jimmy john
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Randomize
