Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
