I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
