thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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