At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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