what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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