Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
