hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
