She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize