Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
ugly people sure do ruin things
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
