Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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